Thursday, October 22, 2009

When they say turn off your electronic devices, they mean you too, asshole!

If there's one thing I can't stand in this life it's people who think they are better than everyone else and thus don't have to follow the rules.

This situation came up recently when ol' Ty was flying for business. We were sitting on the tarmac waiting to push off from the gate and start the ride home after a long day of meetings. As I kicked back to ponder the act faith it is to blindly put my life into the hands of a bunch of strangers, the guy in the seat next to me was busy working his BlackBerry the way a hooker works a john when he's just looking for a $20 handjob.

As we were sitting there, the announcement came to turn off all electronic devices, including (especially?) mobile phones. But Mr. BlackBerry just kept right on going, scanning through his email. They announced it again. Still no change. They announced that the cabin door was shutting and this time they really meant it -- turn off those devices. At this point Mr. BlackBerry turned off the phone part (I think), put the device low in his lap and started playing some game. I kept waiting for one of the flight attendants to grab it out of his hand, or at least reprimand him verbally in front of the others, but nothing. Finally, when we were ready for takeoff, he stuck it in his pocket so the flight attendants couldn't see it -- even though it was still on.

WTF? What part of "turn it off" did this clown not understand? I know that one solitary BlackBerry won't take the plane down, otherwise we wouldn't be allowed to carry phones on board in the same way we're not allowed to bring pen knives or pointy sticks. But still. Do you really want to take that chance?

More to the point, what makes this guy so special he thinks he can ignore the request to turn it off while everyone else complies? I never saw him answer a single email, and it was pretty obvious he wasn't a brain surgeon consulting on an operation to save the life of a four year old child in Zimbabwe. Just another business clown who thinks he's important.

Listen, when they ask you to shut it off, shut it off, asshole. Period. End of discussion.

I also have an idea for the FAA on how to stop this behavior once and for all. You make the announcement, and you give fair warning that in five minutes the plane will send out a pulse that will permanently damage all electronic devices that are still left on. Then you actually send out the pulse and take 'em all down. You know you can do it. Just equip your planes and send out the pulse. People will snap to a whole lot faster.