Yes, I Take Credit Cards, But....

As an add on to Rage's Ignatowski story, which was good stuff, Smails has to chime in on an issue which has happened to me on no more than three occasions in the past couple of months.

On business travel, my preference is to keep all charges on the company credit card. It's cleaner that way and I'm not worried about getting reimbursed for out-of-pocket expenses. When I have to get to and from O'Hare in Chicago, I always cab it. When I order a cab, for pick up at home or in the cab line at O'Hare when I return, I make it known I am paying with a credit card.

What I have learned from experience is that they do take cards, but with a caveat: you have to listen to them bitch at you the entire ride. In fact on one occasion when I got in the cab at O'Hare and confirmed with the driver that I was paying with credit card, he responded with, "No. Cash." So I got out and got in the cab behind him.

This led to a huge scene in the cab line at the airport, with the guard who manages the line reprimanding the driver, who was now screaming at me through the window of the new cab I had just boarded. The new driver informed me that there is a problem with taxi drivers at the airports doing that, especially to people heading downtown, because the guess is that they are tourists or business travelers from out of town and will be intimidated by their tactics.

Sucks, doesn't it? I understand the plight of the cab driver, especially in this day when fuel prices are out of control, and anyone who knows me also knows I am a great cab patron and a heavy tipper. This may be a few isolated incidents, but my guess is that it really is not.

So to the Checker Cabs, Yellow Cabs, Wolley Cabs and Flash Cabs of the world, when you say you take credit cards, do so without obligation or guilt trips. After dealing with the airlines this year, the last thing any of us wants is more bullshit from someone.

How about a Fresca? Hm? Hm?

Judge Elihu Smails

Jim Ignatowski Has Nothing on Real NY Cabbies

Remember Jim Ignatowski -- the lovable cabbie on the hit 1980s series Taxi? Christopher Lloyd played "Iggy" played the man who had the IQ of a rabbit; but the faith of a child ... simple.

My favorite scene with Iggy was when he was taking the written portion of his driving test and he asked his colleague Bobby what a yellow light means. Bobby says, "slow down" -- so Iggy asks again, but slows down his speech. This was repeated three or four more times -- good stuff!

He was a real idiot in the show, but likable. Unfortunately, you can't say the same for real New York cabbies -- they're much dumber, and definitely less likable.

I've been in NY twice this year, and almost every time I have taken a cab I have used my credit card. The machines are set up in the back seat, and it's real easy to use -- a great convenience for passengers. The problem is that every time you use the machine, the cabbie acts like you've just shot him through the chest; that it's such a terrible inconvenience it's going to ruin their whole day, even though it's the easiest way to pay.

The first cab I took this week, I asked the cabbie if he took credit cards, and he said yes -- with the obligatory whining that comes with it. So, I get in the cab and start my ride, at which point he tells me he just installed his credit card system that morning, and I'll be the first to use it (yeah, I win!). We get to the hotel I'm staying at and it turns out his machine actually works (eureka!), at which point he tells me I'm lucky.

Why am I the lucky one? He said I could pay by credit card before I entered the cab, so if it didn't work, that's tough shit for him, not me.

Bottom line, if you are going to offer the service, don't bitch when people decide to use it.

New York cabbies, you suck!

RoadRage