Get Me Some Warm Donkey Droppings!

In ancient Egypt, doctors used to prescribe warm donkey droppings to those who had sore eyes ... and that's exactly what I had after leaving the most recent Cubs game I went to.

Have you ever been to a game where the drunkest guy in the park has to remind everyone that he's the ultimate 10th player; the #1 fan of the team? That's what happened to me last Sunday when the Cubs eked by the Pirates to win the rubber game of the series.

This ass clown (not pictured) was under the impression that everyone around him had forgotten how to cheer on the Cubs. So, what do you do in a situation like that? Apparently, you flail your arms up and down, do a 360 and tell everyone within shouting distance to get up and start cheering.

Gee, thanks monkey boy. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do in that situation, but now that you mention it, I should stand up and start clapping. Thank you for showing me the error of my ways.

Since the Cubs have a good pitching staff, the next pitch was ultimately a third strike or ground out, so Chester assumes that it is all his doing and proceeds to gallop up and down the stairs between are two sections high-fiving everyone in sight. "You did it man! You did it! You're the best Cub fan ever! Way to go!"

If you read this blog regularly, you can see that RoadRage gets infuriated by just about anyone, but guys like this make me want to stick a fork in my eye and end all my misery. One of the most enjoyable things in the world for me to do is to go to a Cubs game at Wrigley Field and see the Cubs win a game when it actually matters, but all that's ruined when I have to deal with dumbasses like this guy.

For all of you 10th players out there, the next time you go to a Cubs game, please understand that the majority of the other fans in the stadium know how to stand up and put their two hands together to cheer on their team. So, sit there and do the same and stop annoying the shit out of everyone. And, I hate to break it to you, but the fact that you carry on like a moron the whole game isn't what's leading the Cubs to victory. People like you make me think Lee Elia was right.

RoadRage